Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Get Over Someone You Love - I Will Tell You How

You loved someone that you thought you would be with forever; it seemed to be the perfect match. Then something happened to end the relationship and you haven’t been able to let it go. You think you’re over the person then something happens and there you go again trying to figure it all out. You know you need to over the loss but somehow it just isn’t happening. You need help in how to fet over someone you love.
There are no easy answers for how to over someone you love. If there were you wouldn’t be looking for the answer; you would already have it. For most people it’s a slow and painful process. Often people think they are completely over someone and even a year or two later they are reminded of that person and fell all the pain and sadness again.
If you had invested a lot emotionally in the relationship that ended, you may feel sad for a long period. But that doesn’t have to mean that the sadness has to paralyze you emotionally or cause serious depression. By getting over the person, you can accept that losing the person made you sad and look back on it as you would any loss that carries a lot of emotion with it.
If the breakup is recent, the best thing you can do is face the pain and ride it out. If you really cared for the person it’s going to hurt no matter what you do. There are some things you can do that will lessen the pain. For example, remove any visual reminders such as photographs, gifts, letters, etc from your home. If you’re not ready to get rid of these items at least pack them up for awhile. You may want to avoid going to the places you and your ex went. These are fairly common recommendations and are at least worth a try.
If after some time has passed you are really having trouble functioning in your day to day life, you may find it helpful to seek counseling. Be honest and tell the counselor that you have been through a painful breakup and ask the counselor how to get over someone you love. The counselor can offer advice and be very specific with you in what you can try. A counselor can also probably offer you better advice than friends or family.
Your friends and family want to help but they are often in an awkward position in such a situation. If they say too much against the other person you may feel they are saying you made a bad choice in loving that person. If they defend the other person you may feel they don’t care for you. See what I mean? They are in a no-win situation. The counselor, however, has no emotional ties with you. You can be perfectly honest with this person and vice versa.
Feel free to go to counseling for as long as you need to. If the counselor feels you’re spending too much time dwelling on how to get over someone you love, they’ll tell you. Get'em Back


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